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In a short while I’ll begin the ritual that wraps up this year’s celebration of the Feast of Spider, a two-day festival I’ve adapted from the tarantati of Galatina. I’ve been doing this for a couple years now, and each time it’s had a different “theme” and feel to it.
Although there was a great deal of intensity this time around there wasn’t the atmosphere of pollution, melancholy and painful confrontation leading to cathartic transformation that I’ve experienced in the past. In fact, Spider was surprisingly gentle and supportive with me – so much so that I found it a little unsettling. Perhaps she felt that I’ve already faced my challenges this year – there’s certainly been a lot of them and at times it’s felt like I’ve taken a stroll through the inferno. Which is appropriate considering the oracle that Dionysos gave me back in 2008 where he said that the fire was coming and I needed to be ready to dance through the flames.
The fire came. Boy did it ever. No part of my life has gone untouched by it. There have been so many changes in such a relatively short span of time that it’s dizzying just to think about it. A lot of stuff was burnt away – but it needed to be because it was old, unhealthy and no longer served a purpose in my life. What wasn’t consumed became transformed, reshaped, repurposed.
I’m not really the person I was when this whole process started – but I survived it. I’m here and in many ways I’m stronger than I’ve ever been before.
Spider has reminded me of this a lot over the last couple days and if anything that has been the “theme” of this year’s festival. Taking stock after the trials, remembering who I am and why I’m here, wrapping up all the remaining loose threads so that I can go forward unencumbered.
I got a tattoo today to commemorate everything I’ve been through – and to give myself an extra boost of mojo to help rebuild my life in the wake of the purifying flames. The tattoo is the 21st Hebrew letter and I got it on the lower portion of my right leg. Those who know the esoteric significance of this letter will understand why I got it. (Aside from the fact that it makes an awesome pun that only a handful of people are likely to get.) With this tattoo I bring to a close the portion of my life I have affectionately been calling Operation:
There’s only one thing left to do – and that’s what this post is about.
I’m shutting down my livejournal. I won’t delete it – too much of my history is here – but it’s the last thing I’ve been holding onto from the time before the transformation began. If I still felt it served a purpose I would keep it going … but honestly, it’s been a long while since I’ve gotten anything out of participating here at livejournal. The whole culture has changed. Most of my close friends who used to post here moved on or stopped making quality posts for the most part. There’s still interesting stuff being said, but most of that material has gravitated over to an assortment of blogs, as indeed the majority of my meaningful content has as well. I’d rather put my energy into The House of Vines and more intimate, in-depth correspondence with people through e-mail, etc. I really hope that I can stay in touch with the friends I’ve got here, because you guys are important to me – but I just don’t feel that livejournal is the best way to do that anymore.
You can find me at the following sites:
And of course sannion@gmail.com.
In the future I’ll be posting notices about the monthly Dionysos Day oracles over at The House of Vines blog – and I’ll also update the events page of my site with the dates in advance, so you don’t have to worry about missing out on them.
Some time later this week I should also be announcing the release of my latest book From the Satyr’s Mouth – I was originally going to wait to close this journal down until after the book is out, but I figure the time for that is now, while all the loose ends are getting wrapped up during Spider’s festival.
Thank you all for the wonderful experiences – I’ve greatly cherished being able to meet you and follow along with your life’s adventures. May bright blessings be yours in the days to come!
07/02/10 - Edited to add: From the Satyr's Mouth is finally out! Details can be found here.
